I.E.P.

I don't know if any other three letters can raise my stress levels as high as IEP can. Does anyone like attending these meetings? Most times it feels like an exercise in frustration and futility.

And actually, my upcoming IEP meeting next Monday is rather pointless because the original IEP meeting in the fall was never followed up because the classroom teacher and the Learning Assistance teacher could never find a date that worked. So now here it is June and the year is almost over.

It's all such a frustrating process because the behaviors the teachers see at school are never the same as the ones we see at home, for a variety of reasons. Probably the most obvious reason is that I'm not at the school. For my child with attachment issues and FASD I am the main target. But it affects the behavior and achievements at school. How do I get through to the school staff that the reason the homework isn't done is because it was hidden in the bedroom and the planner has mysteriously disappeared. And the reason the homework is hidden is because my child can then avoid having to sit with me at the kitchen table one on one and work on it. Or the homework is too hard and my child knows it. Or my child would rather be doing anything else but sitting. Or the child knows that the other kids have already finished their homework and get to hang out and play. Or, or, or. There's a gazillion reasons.

The worst part of the IEP is that I feel as if I'm the negative mom who never sees anything good in their child. But if I don't focus on the negative, nothing will change. Yes I focus on the positive too, but it seems a constant battle to keep it in the front of their minds that just because my child was able to accomplish something once or twice doesn't mean my child can remember it the next time. Or that my child can't always transfer the knowledge used in one situation to another. It doesn't really matter if it's the ADD or the FASD or the attachment. The result is the same.

Plus, the teachers are all so burnt out already. They still have a month to go, and it's now the season of field trips (you couldn't pay me enough to go on the school bus with 45 kids anywhere!), assessments and report cards. I sure don't envy teachers. It's a job I know I could never do.