I wasn't always like this...

I'm positive there was a time when I was organized, when I was never late for anything, when I never ran out of toilet paper. I'm sure of it.

I distinctly remember having "it" together. I distinctly remember rolling my eyes at the whining and complaining of other women who couldn't seem to work full time and run their households. I mean seriously, how hard can it be? And as for those moms who chose to stay home with their kids instead of returning to work...what did they DO all day long?

Yes, that was before I had children. That was before, when I was younger. That was before,when all I had to concern myself with was my wardrobe and what I was going to do on the weekend. It's all a blur now.

I seem to recall(because my memory is not what it used to be...) that the official start my brain deterioration began when we first started looking into adoption. As we went through the home study process I discovered that I was starting to question the accuracy of my memories. My husband seemed to remember the same event completely differently than I. (Not saying that he's right, just...well...I highly doubt it!) Then as we began the wait for a proposal is when I noticed my mind wandering off when I should be concentrating on my job as an accountant. I would be listening to music and dreaming of what my baby would look like, and what clothes I would buy for him or her.

As the days and weeks passed I would spend the time alternating between day dreaming and becoming more anxious that it would never happen. When we were matched with a birth mom and she changed her mind, and then again it happened, is when I started going down hill fast. I realized how little I could control this process, so I began to find projects that I could control. My veggie garden was perfectly weeded. I reorganized, packed and labelled all our camping equipment. My house was spotless. And then the call came, and we were off to Chicago to meet our new baby girl. That was the end. And the beginning as my new world and new life as an exhausted mother began.

From then on it was a regular slide into short term memory loss. Oh sure, long term was still there - I could remember all the words to Hey Jude - but not what I was supposed to be getting at the store, or what day it was.

Fast forward twelve years to today when I discovered that my car insurance expired two days ago and I had been driving without insurance. In my previous life, that would never have happened. So now I have to ride my bike to town and renew it, but I can't find my cell phone, and what is my bike lock combination?

Can I get a brain transplant????